The Ninth Commandment tells us that slander is wrong and God condemns it. Isn't it sad that one of the places we often see this is in marriage. A Russian proverb speaks of the foolishness of slander in marriage when it says: "A dog is wiser than a woman: he won't bark at his master." Too many men and women are guilty of such stupidity: they bark and snarl at those closest to them.
In marriage, it is the duty of the husband to be, among other things, the protector of his wife. If he instead defames his wife, it is an indication of both an inability to protect and to govern. The man has denied to his wife a standard of godly conduct to which she is entitled.
The failure doesn't stop there though, it extends to the whole family. The father has the responsibility to lead the teaching of his children. Where the father fails to be a pattern of responsible and thoughtful speech, the children are deprived of a major stabilizing force in their lives. We see this failure often in our culture today.
Men, let's commit ourselves to being careful in how we communicate with our wives. We need to reflect godly character in our words and actions that we might be men who are willing to fulfill our duty and calling as men who protect and govern well. In doing so we will build strong and godly families, glorifying God.
Sunday, August 17, 2008
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Medicinal Gossip
Are you a spin doctor? I know many who have a doctorate in "spin". Probably, if we are honest, we all have some sort of advanced degree in "spin". A spin doctor is one who puts a spin on the news or other information in order to manipulate its meaning. The Bible speaks extensively on spin doctors, and you're probably not going to like it, but I'll share it here with you (without putting a spin on it!)
A spin doctor takes the truth and twists it. We might understand this by some other terms: slanderer, gossip, talebearer, backbiter, liar, false witness, or hypocrite with your mouth. The problem is, even more so in our information age, that its commonplace to take information about others and share it, even when you don't know the truth of the matter. We often assume we know the truth or know the person well enough that what we hear or read must be true, but often it is not. The issue though is, what does God say about this?
Proverbs 11:13 "A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy man keeps a secret." How many times has a gossip betrayed your confidence? How many times have you betrayed another by sharing a confidence about them? Maybe it was innocently enough ... say a prayer request? Very Christian, don't you think? Medicinal gossip, necessary to help the person. After all, how would God ever know their need if you didn't tell it to others and then pray about it? Oh yes, God already knows, he knows everything. So why are we so quick to break our brother's confidence, with a little medicinal gossip?
Proverbs 20:19 "A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid a man who talks too much." We know who those people are that "talk too much". Unfortunately they are very good at what they do. They can get you to to talk about things best left unsaid, but they need their information to talk about. The Bible says avoid the person. It doesn't say talk with them but try to watch what you say. It says AVOID. Simply really, just avoid them. But we don't. Why do you suppose that is? Do we need our own gossip fix? Remember they take information and they give it. Do you enjoy gossip? Do you see it for what it is?
The problem is, if you ask people, most will never admit to being a gossip. Yet I'll bet you could name five gossips off the top of your head for me, right now. Would someone put you on the list? Gossip is such an easy trap to fall into. It is bearing false witness, a violation of the ninth commandment. God told us not to go there. Shouldn't we examine our hearts? When I take the time to listen to what people say to me in conversation, even very godly people, I'm amazed at how much of their conversation is pure gossip. You and I better look closely at what may be a very ingrained and evil habit in our conversation.
We have no problem with the eighth commandment, not stealing. Of course we shouldn't do that. The ninth commandment, not lying. Of course we shouldn't do that either. Gossip's not lying, is it?? Of course it is. It bears false witness. You wouldn't tell your children that stealing things valued less that one dollar is okay would you? Don't try to justify the "little" lies of gossip. False witness or gossip is a sin that destroys another person's reputation and name. False witness or gossip is a sin that betrays a confidence. False witness or gossip is a sin that sows discord amongst the church. You've probably been on both sides of gossip. We should know better ... so why don't we. Let's repent of where we have been on this one and be obedient to God, today.
A spin doctor takes the truth and twists it. We might understand this by some other terms: slanderer, gossip, talebearer, backbiter, liar, false witness, or hypocrite with your mouth. The problem is, even more so in our information age, that its commonplace to take information about others and share it, even when you don't know the truth of the matter. We often assume we know the truth or know the person well enough that what we hear or read must be true, but often it is not. The issue though is, what does God say about this?
Proverbs 11:13 "A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy man keeps a secret." How many times has a gossip betrayed your confidence? How many times have you betrayed another by sharing a confidence about them? Maybe it was innocently enough ... say a prayer request? Very Christian, don't you think? Medicinal gossip, necessary to help the person. After all, how would God ever know their need if you didn't tell it to others and then pray about it? Oh yes, God already knows, he knows everything. So why are we so quick to break our brother's confidence, with a little medicinal gossip?
Proverbs 20:19 "A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid a man who talks too much." We know who those people are that "talk too much". Unfortunately they are very good at what they do. They can get you to to talk about things best left unsaid, but they need their information to talk about. The Bible says avoid the person. It doesn't say talk with them but try to watch what you say. It says AVOID. Simply really, just avoid them. But we don't. Why do you suppose that is? Do we need our own gossip fix? Remember they take information and they give it. Do you enjoy gossip? Do you see it for what it is?
The problem is, if you ask people, most will never admit to being a gossip. Yet I'll bet you could name five gossips off the top of your head for me, right now. Would someone put you on the list? Gossip is such an easy trap to fall into. It is bearing false witness, a violation of the ninth commandment. God told us not to go there. Shouldn't we examine our hearts? When I take the time to listen to what people say to me in conversation, even very godly people, I'm amazed at how much of their conversation is pure gossip. You and I better look closely at what may be a very ingrained and evil habit in our conversation.
We have no problem with the eighth commandment, not stealing. Of course we shouldn't do that. The ninth commandment, not lying. Of course we shouldn't do that either. Gossip's not lying, is it?? Of course it is. It bears false witness. You wouldn't tell your children that stealing things valued less that one dollar is okay would you? Don't try to justify the "little" lies of gossip. False witness or gossip is a sin that destroys another person's reputation and name. False witness or gossip is a sin that betrays a confidence. False witness or gossip is a sin that sows discord amongst the church. You've probably been on both sides of gossip. We should know better ... so why don't we. Let's repent of where we have been on this one and be obedient to God, today.
Sunday, August 03, 2008
How Did You Fight?
Life can be difficult and a struggle. For many, the questions of why am I here, what purpose does my life really have, go unanswered. For some the lie might simply be in avoiding the question. For some, it might be to say my purpose is to glorify God, without knowing what that truly means.
In the very beginning of the Bible we see God gave us his purpose and told us how to glorify him. In Genesis 1:28, God called us to his purpose. "God blessed them and said to them, 'Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and over every living creature that moves on the ground.'"
Some call this the Creation Mandate, God's command to us. What would glorify him? Being fruitful and increasing in number. Filling the earth and ruling or overseeing it, under him. Note, he is sovereign and has granted us the right to work under him in this and all activities. That glorifies him, not acting as if we are sovereign and rule in our own might, determining for ourselves what is good and right. Seems that issue came up shortly after creation in Genesis 3 when man decided to operate outside God's authority.
When man decided in Genesis 3 to be AS God rather that to act UNDER God, what happened? Man sinned and the world changed forever. What did God do, did he give up? Not at all as this too was within his plan for mankind. Among other things, our failure was not to be the end. We were to get back up, God would provide a payment for our failure and sin through his very Son's death. We were to get back up and do as he said. We were to be fruitful and increasing in number, filling the earth and ruling or overseeing it, under him.
God calls us to diligence, a very character trait of God. We are to be like him, not quitting and giving up. We are to get back up, recognize our sin and failure, repent of it, turning back to God and walking under him in all that we do, in obedience and submission to his authority in our life.
A man who fails is not a failure. A man who fails and gives up is a failure. Whenever we try to succeed on our own, apart from God, we will fail. The question is whether in it, we will learn, not give up, and continue on in God's power, under him, accomplishing that which he calls us to. Or, whether we simply give up. The lie in our lives comes when we give up and say "what's the use, its just too hard." Here is a verse from a poem that reminds me of this:
"You are beaten to earth? Well, well, what’s that?
Come up with a smiling face.
It’s nothing against you to fall down flat,
But to lie there – that’s disgrace.
The harder you’re thrown, why the higher you bounce;
Be proud of your blackened eye!
It isn’t the fact that you’re licked that counts,
It’s how did you fight – and why?"
See how that verse ends? "It's how did you fight - and why?" That is God's question to us. How did you fight, he says. Was it under me and according to my law and word? And why do you fight the good fight? God asks if we understand our purpose, the great "why" question in our life. Do we understand the Creation Mandate? Do we understand why he put us here? Or do we choose to lie to ourselves and make it all meaninglessness or make it all about ourselves? Unfortunately, I think we all fall down there more often than we know (since we are so good at deceiving ourselves).
The wonderful truth is that God never gave up on you or me. He is diligent in working in our lives. Let's not give up either, let's not lie to ourselves, and let's work diligently at what he put us here for. Let's study his written Word to us, his communication of why we are here, what we are to do and how. Let's be wholly committed to him. I'll leave you with the words God spoke through Moses in Deuteronomy 30:11-20. They are as applicable to us as they were to the nation of Israel, as we too are God's people:
"Now what I am commanding you today is not too difficult for you or beyond your reach. It is not up in heaven, so that you have to ask, “Who will ascend into heaven to get it and proclaim it to us so we may obey it?” Nor is it beyond the sea, so that you have to ask, “Who will cross the sea to get it and proclaim it to us so we may obey it?” No, the word is very near you; it is in your mouth and in your heart so you may obey it. See, I set before you today life and prosperity, death and destruction. For I command you today to love the LORD your God, to walk in his ways, and to keep his commands, decrees and laws; then you will live and increase, and the LORD your God will bless you in the land you are entering to possess. But if your heart turns away and you are not obedient, and if you are drawn away to bow down to other gods and worship them, I declare to you this day that you will certainly be destroyed. You will not live long in the land you are crossing the Jordan to enter and possess. This day I call heaven and earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live and that you may love the LORD your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the LORD is your life, and he will give you many years in the land he swore to give to your fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob."
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